Wacky Wednesday!

Thought I'd share some of the status changes my Facebook friends enjoyed during our vacation (with a few goofy pictures thrown in for good measure):

July 22, 8:44AM
Yet more evidence of my stellar physical condition: two hours in the Lazy River last night, hoisting the Littles on and off of floats, and now I can barely lift my right arm. Where did I put the ibuprofen...?

July 22, 9:39AM
Carson (so excited to have Evan down here so he's not outnumbered by the girls) told Evan they could be "on the same team." Evan replied that Carson could be his "brother from another mother." Carson didn't get it. I thought it was very sweet...
July 22, 10:57AM
So, day two of vacation and we've already required maintenance help for a dripping sink and had our debit cards frozen by the Fraud Department at the bank for "suspicious purchases" like gas and food. Yep, sounds like my kind of vacation...

July 22, 1:45PM
Apparently, I'm more relaxed than I thought. We were all headed out and it took me 'til we were in the elevator to realize I wasn't wearing shoes. And I NEVER go barefoot!!

July 23, 8:59AM
Another gorgeous day in Florida! Can't beat life when your biggest decision of the day is "beach or Lazy River?"...
July 23, 11:06AM
Dear family: Please stop yelling at me when I tell you I need to do laundry. Even on vacation, those beach towels, swimsuits, and bath towels won't wash and fold themselves. Trust me, family, doing laundry on vacation is STILL a vacation! Love, Mom.

July 23, 3:22PM
Dear family: Please don't give me a hard time when I insist on staying in the AC during the heat of the afternoon. That near-fainting spell was real this afternoon and I'm still feeling weak. I promise that resting indoors on vacation is STILL a vacation to me. Enjoy the Lazy River without me. Love, Mom.

July 24, 8:40AM
Last night, Molly told me we need to stay on "vuh-cation" forever and that she will be angry when I go back to work. Uh-oh...
July 24, 6:49PM
Annoying your big sister and her boyfriend + ignoring Daddy's orders to "cool it" = Krispy Kreme donut to the face. Dude, how long did you think Meggie was gonna tolerate you??

July 25, 1:38PM
Beginning to realize why vacations don't last forever. All this togetherness is starting to get a little annoying. Apparently, I adore my children, but only in small doses...

July 25, 5:54PM
Meggie spent all day today lying in the sun so it "looks like she was on vacation." I figure there are better ways to show that than premature aging and skin cancer. My near-empty bank account, for example...
July 25, 6:03PM
My pre-vacation manicure (that I was thrilled with before we left for Florida) is now getting on my nerves. The polish is chipping and my nails are too long. Yep, I'm heading back to reality...

July 25, 7:53PM
Available for free: one snarky teenager and two bickering Littles. Husband negotiable...

July 25, 9:33PM
The question that will define this trip: "Who farteded?" We're a classy crew, y'all...
July 26, 9:11AM
Yesterday, Molly told me she's gonna miss me when I'm up in heaven. Do you think my family is planning to kill me down here so there's more room in the minivan for the ride home? Uh-oh...

July 26, 9:44AM
On this vacation so far, I have consumed too many calories, fought with my family, broken a toe, dislocated a shoulder, nearly fainted from heat exhaustion, and completely ignored the 10 page scholarly paper that's due next Tuesday. BUT I have also relaxed, laughed, , slept in, and refrained from getting sunburned. Sounds like a successful vacation to me...

July 26, 10:38AM
Me: Thanks for making breakfast.
Daddy: I'm here to serve.
Me: That IS your love language, acts of service.
Meggie: What's mine?
Me: Quality time...
Daddy: ...in the bathroom.
Bwahahahaha!!
July 26, 11:09AM
Carson's favorite word this trip has been "boobs." Apparently, 7 years of age is when boys begin the downhill slide into manhood...

July 26, 1:42PM
Most awkward moment of this vacation? When Molly made Evan pray before dinner while Beyonce's "Bootylicious" was playing in the background on my iPod...

July 26, 2:08PM
Funniest thing I heard today? When Meggie tossed Molly out of Evan's bedroom, Molly yelled, "I NEVER GET TO HAVE FUN...WITH A BOY!!" Uhhhh, let's keep it that way, young lady...
July 26, 4:39PM
Our last day at the beach and it has been storming most of the day. Maybe my family won't need to kill ME to make more room for the ride home. With all the bickering and fighting among the kids, it's survival of the fittest in here...

July 27, 8:37AM
Only I could manage six sunburn-free days in Florida only to get a scald burn in the shower the morning we are leaving! Apparently, we have NO cold water!!

~~~

Hope you're having a fabulous week!